You Are Special

Dear Florence,

Life is so unpredictable. Changes always come along, in big or small ways. I don’t know what happened that this sudden change has turned my world upside down. I don’t know exactly what it is, it just hit me, but there is something really special about you.

It might be all the things I see on the surface, the things that everyone notices and admires about you, qualities, capabilities and a wonderful smile obviously connected to a warm and loving heart; these things set you apart from everyone else. But it may also be the big things … the person you really are that I hope to know more someday. And it might also be the little things … the way you walk and all your actions. I receive so much joy just being able to see a smile in your eyes. If I ever figure out the magic that makes you so special, I’d probably find out that it’s a combination of all these things. You are a rare combination of so many special things. You are really amazing.

Inside of me there is a place where my sweetest dreams reside, where my highest hopes are kept alive, where my deepest feelings are felt and where my favorite memories are safe and warm. I find that you’re on my mind more often than any other thought. Sometimes I bring you there purposely just to make my day brighter. But more often, you surprise me and find your own ways into my thoughts. There are even times when I awaken, I realize that you’ve been a part of my dreams. Then during the day, when my imagination is free to run, it takes me into your arms and allows me to linger there knowing there’s nothing I’d rather do. I know my thoughts are only reflecting the loving hopes of my heart because whenever they wander, they always take me to you.

Only the most special things in my world get to come inside my heart and stay. And now, I realize how deeply my life has been touched by you.

Yours Sincerely,

Muhammad Razif

Picture Puurfect!!

Blessed Soul…

Weekend started with a bang despite being on MC for the past week due to my chest injury. Pillay plan to meet me Friday night, just to catch  up on ole times… And sure enough! took a bus down to Cineleisure bout 12 midnight, never have i leave only at 12 to town HAH! Met up with some old friends, chatted over supper. As promised, Pillay treated me to movies and supper! Well am honored to be there and catch it with you man! You know how much i appreciate time spent with you since a very super duper long time! Hard times have really thought oneself to appreciate and love the things and people around you… Only to head back home at 5.30 am!

With little time to sleep, still made my way down to office only to be like an hour late. Gosh! i owe jeremy a report as to why am late for company’s corporate meeting! Thought it would end on the dot at 1 pm but it ended way to early… Tex ted Princess, telling her she could make her way down earlier once she’s done with home stuffs. No plans as to what’s our activity was for the day, random things.. random thoughts.. Decided to bum at Esplanade.

Boy Oh Boy…

Splendid it was.. There we were in this shady spot with the sea breeze gushing pass us, she’s leaning against me watching those army dudes and participants rehearsing for NDP and with the background music. It really make things so wonderfully romantic. Yes it may sound simple but the whole ambiance and settings makes it so romantic whats more when two people are head over heals for one another… I’m a simple guy and is always satisfied with simple things and that Saturday Afternoon sure was a memory worth keeping.. Never have i felt so much love before. Wish the day would never end, Wish we could plant our self there and never move off, Unfortunately we have a BBQ session to attend too.. BBQ was a fun one.. with people like Zedong, Yugan, Eric, Moon and not forgetting the host Ian and Shalon and plus my beautiful Princess. Ending our session with Taboo. Boy! Yugan sure crack us up like hell… the way he describes, the way he act it out is priceless. Dude, ever thought bout acting? Think you should. hahaha..

Puurfect Setting…

Made Princess waited for like 20 mins at Bukit Batok Platform, Gosh i felt bad! (Sorry Bao Bei). Accompanied me to OFFICE again on a weekend. Needed to plan out a program for Chatsworth International School since their trip up to Batam been canceled due to the recent H1N1. haiz, hate it when everything is so last minute but heck that’s part of the JOB, take it or leave RIGHT? hahaha.. waited like an angel she was,finally am done with my work, all ready to fight the war tomorrow with Peter Boss. Once again with no plans in mind before heading down to Yu Long’s Birthday Party, all we know we wanted to have yet another fruitful day together. Gave her options either window shop around town area or head down by the beach.. Without hesitation, she nods smilingly to my 2nd option. Purposely took a bus down to Pasir Ris, knowing that it would take awfully long to get there but Hey! time is precious, Every moment.. Every minute counts if ya know what i meant!There we were strolling and looking out for the Perfect Spot to dream away. Decided to plant our self at this break water where there was no one in sight but people came running in after like a few minutes. haha!

By The Beach, Caught A Glimpse of the Sunset, Side by Side where she lean against me and i hold her tight in my arms, slowly chatting away til dark came where i decided to sing her a song by Jason Mraz  ‘I’m yours’. It was so random on my part from there it only lead to another song. Song after song, Genre after Genre.. suddenly found our self lying on the break water and started admiring the moon and the stars, such a beautiful sight! How i wish the night would never end, How i wish we don’t have any other plans for the evening but darn all beautiful things must come to and end… GOSH! it was certainly a Picture Perfect Moment. It was what i always dream about. To be with my special precious ones sitting by the beach watching the sunset side by side and whispering sweet nothings and singing to each other.. She really made my dream come true! Such an innocently adorable thing!

Thank You Bao Bei for the most meaningful weekend i’ve had so far! Nothing beats that. Not only one day but both consecutive days!!! Gosh i’m so in love with you… To end it off here’s a picture which made the evenings so meaningful……

Picture Perfect.. ~

Puurrffeecctt Moment!

Interestingly Surprised! Interestingly Interested! Interestingly Mind-BLowing! Interestingly Amazing..

Hey Hey!

First and foremost , It’s been a pretty darn looooong time SINCE i last touch this BLOG of mine. Well, This year 2009 have been a very HECTIC life for me. With all the resolutions which i made to myself, i didnt even fullfilled it! Don’t get me started now on my list, it’s never ending.. it’s good enough am here to pen down all of my thoughts for the past 6 months or so. Seeing this posted out in about 2 hours time will be  a shock to many.. Esp those who are expecting to hear or see new things bout me? Well, guys granting you people your wishes.

Life is just like a roller coaster or to better quote from my blood bro, ” Life always moves in a circle. You’ll experience your ups and your downs. No matter how bad ya at ya lowest peak, you’ll rise to ya highest peak once again.” Well, we are all actors and actresses whose starring in the biggest movie ever. Our lifes been pre destined, be it good or bad but ultimately it’s how you want to make a difference in your life and others, that’s the most important part of all. Going through my journey for the past 6 months wasn’t easy at all, Especially the company have roll the number of camps twice as much as what we last year. It’s been that busy til my team have changed and it’s affecting everyone one way or another. The best thing is that everyone noticed it too which is GOOD! Political issues… Personal issues… Friendship issues.. Family issues… Monetary issues.. all was just in a big chunky mess. Through observation , dedication, and obligation which made us realise all of these problems and slowly sorting it out one by one. One thing which my team was blessed with, was a hardworking and dedicated Team Leader. Without him, thnigs will just get worsen through and through and by the time that happens all hells break loose! i’m seriously honoured and blessed to have him as not only as a team leader .. not only as a friend .. not only as a mentor .. but as a brother whom i always look up too. I owe him part of life to him for without him, i would’nt be the guy i am today even though i can be a screw up at times or messy with my paper work or just plain stubborn, his support was  countless! Thank You very much Jeremy Tang. Really appreciate all ya time and effort invested in me and the people around us. You definately make a difference in everyone of us.

This year, i have been taking more important contracts like high risks kids from MCYS and Mendaki and their duration varies from 4D3N – 5D4N. With that duration and handling these bunch of kids ain’t easy. At first, you can see me cursing and swearing from the bottom of my heart but as i took more contracts like this i tend to love it more and more. It’s the feelings and the bondness you get from these bunch of kids. Society always have a negative concept bout these kids but honestly they are nice kids.. they are fun kids.. they are trustworthy kids, it’s just that they have been influenced too much on the dark side. You need to understand and learn where they first come from, what kind of background are they from, what kind of problems they face day by day. Tell you you would feel sorry for them. The more you think negatively bout them, the more they will show you how negative these they can behave. Humans are such, you inject positivity in them, they will have that positivity mindset BUT if you inject them with negativity then negativity is what you get.. So please stop judging them by their outer appearances or character yet understand them and judge them by their inner soul.. After all we are all humans, and everyone deserves a chance to correct their mistake. It’s all bout giving chances and believing in them and I’m pretty sure they will do the society good. It’s definately an eye opener for me and it’s amazing at how much you actually learn from these kids.Thank you for giving me such opportunities like this. am handling the 3 run for Mendaki but unfortunately i’m down for reservist. Was pretty upset at first as i was looking forward to the camp where i could share and guide these kids to the correct paths. i may not be the best of the best but i feel i can really connect with the kids. Thanks to Jeremy’s opnion, i’m actually defferring my reservist for this year just to spend my time with these wonderful kids. Honestly for them, i would sacrifice and go the extra mile just to spend time with these kids, bringing them through the camp sharing and guiding them and importantly to be able to change their mindset to be a better person in society..

Interestingly enough despite  being all busy and spending lesser time with my family, friends and importantly with my ownself, Interestingly enough was caught by surprise. Never could imagine that the impossible turns out to be possible. Haha.. all i could say fate brought us together. Looking back on our little history we had, where i’m always disturbing you to a point ya hated me so much as to not even wanna do my camp. Well that’s me for you, I’m forever disturbing anyone and everyone around me even though i may not know ya that well. It all started after the 1 day event held in Sentosa. You caught my eyes.. from there onwards, i’ve decided to make an effort to know more bout you. Months past by, you just seem to surprised me in every way… to sum it up, You’re a Girlish Girl with an Attitude. Thats what i like in a girl and that is certainly is a Plus point. As much as i told myself i would not fall or get myself into another relationship despite what i’ve been through, it’s hard to predict our future for we could only plan and manage to the best of our ability but through time one’s mindset would changed as we progress on.  The real jizz of it came only recently where i decided to step up and pluck the courage to further express myself. Knowing me, i would normally express through actions or by penning it down. It’s seriously hard for me to say it out face to face but i did it. Even though i fumble and paused a lot of times, i really did my best in expressing it. haha.. kinda funny when i think bout it but it was all worth the while. Didnt know it was a mutual thing bewteen us afterall the things and mean words or how irritating i can be, you still bare feelings for me. I couldnt find a proper word to describe how much i appreciate you,  much to say i’m blessed to have eventually found a Princess like you. Honestly would want to sincerely apologize for all those meany words use on you, how irritating i can be. Certainly mean no harm, just a harmless dude who’s always seeking fun to spice up the life of everyone. At the end of the day, we do compliment each other well.

Princess, Let’s take it slow.. Let’s understand and communicate better.. Let’s be the best of what we can be.. Let’s path our journey together…

Much Love!

Surprisingly today met up with my blood brother, Pillay! My GOD, he have changed alot! i’m really happy for him now. The way he talk.. The way he looks.. The way he wants his life to be just makes me feel so happy for him. It’s always been a pleasure of mine to spend time with you talking bout life. It’s very meaningful and it does helps me to reflect on myself as well. No matter how busy i am or how long i’ve been ignoring you, there’s always a reason behind it. You are one of those whom i would never ever forget not even in my next life bro! After all that we have been through together, how could you expect me to leave you man! Ya a part of my family and ya have always been. REMEMBER THAT!!!  Let’s do our normal catching up and chillin out like we always do. Believe the time have come for us to look forward and stirve for the best and nothing for the best bro! See spending time with you is all worth the while.. what we talk .. what we share.. we cant do it with others. The content of it are so meaningful to both you and me, as much as i share and guide you, i am also doing it formyself.  Nobody knows you better then i do and nobody knows me better then you do man. Now we left with one more barger!!! Let’s work on him like how i work on yoou. He needs the wake up call! As much as i believe in my family and my princess.. i certainly believe in the both of you very much! only time will tell man. Like i’ve mention to you, i’ve two more friends which im currently nurturing, i really hope that i could introduce these two dudes to you guys. Fun pair of dudes.. kinda remind me of how we are back in those days!!

Well,  there are many more to pen down but have to cut it short til here. Made a promise so i shouldn’t break it!! At the end of the day, nothing beats then penning down your thoughts and opinions! it really does helps you to reflect and think through all of the current and past events in your life. Definitely a healthy way!

The Littlest Things

“Littlest Things”

Sometimes I find myself sittin’ back and reminiscing
Especially when I have to watch other people kissin’
And I remember when you started callin’ me your miss’s
All the play fightin’, all the flirtatious disses
I’d tell you sad stories about my childhood
I don’t why I trusted you but I knew that I could
We’d spend the whole weekend lying in our own dirt
I was just so happy in your boxers and your t-shirt

[Chorus]
Dreams, Dreams
Of when we had just started things
Dreams of you and me
It seems, It seems
That I can’t shake those memories
I wonder if you have the same dreams too.

The littlest things that take me there
I know it sounds lame but its so true
I know its not right, but it seems unfair
That the things are reminding me of you
Sometimes I wish we could just pretend
Even if only for one weekend
So come on, Tell me
Is this the end?

Drinkin’ tea in bed
Watching DVD’s
When I discovered all your dirty grotty magazines
You take me out shopping and all we’d buy is trainers
As if we ever needed anything to entertain us
the first time that you introduced me to your friends
and you could tell I was nervous, so you held my hand
when I was feeling down, you made that face you do
There’s no one in the world that could replace you

[Chorus]
Dreams, Dreams
Of when we had just started things
Dreams of me and you
It seems, It seems
That I can’t shake those memories
I wonder if you feel the same way too

The littlest things that take me there
I know it sounds lame but its so true
I know its not right, but it seems unfair
That the things reminding me of you
Sometimes I wish we could just pretend
Even if only for one weekend
So come on, Tell me
Is this the end?

Somehow rather it kinda relates back to me.. Littlest things which I would need to get by day by day..                                                                                                         Really hope it’s not the end for I for the first time would really want to pursue our relationship to the next level…

Wondering Soul..

Dear Mojo,

Where have you been? how are you doing? Do you know i miss you a lot? And do you know a lot of people misses you too.. Please come back. We really miss you a lot. I can’t do this on my own, i need you to be here with me. Control my emotions.. Control my temper… Control my words used… Control my thinking… Control me!!!

I have been spending the pass 6 hours wondering around Chua Chu Kang. Thinking to myself.. what have i achieve? for myself, for my friends and for my beloved ones? To think again i have not been doing much in achieving alot of things but instead losing them at the end of the day. Do you know that my or should i say your most beloved one just ended our relationship today?  Yes, unexpected not at the time simply not at this very day. To think of it another 3 more days, it will be our 8 months anniversary. To think of it when i have planned to sit down and really talk things out. i got things to say, i got things  to proposed to her so that we can start 2009 afresh and definitely we can proved to ourself that we are not wasting each other time and all the promises that i made to her will finally be seen. But i was too late. i fume up today. As usual!! I’m sorry I’m such a failure mojo. It’s just my temper which i tried to control but it burst out. But honestly i don’t mean it to be this way. I gave her friendship band which she  made for me back. I feel that the way it was being pass to me was improper and i want her to wear it on for me. I didn’t mean to return to her as in not accepting her. You see that band she made for me was from her heart, 16 days in Laos not only was she doing a good deed but also thinking bout me 24/7. She put her heart and soul to it. I really love the band alot and i really appreciate it too but she got the wrong interpretation of it. I sincerely apologize for that. Then it blew into a heated argument.

She really wanted to talk things all out and settle it there and then. But i was in the right mind to. I know once too many a times we argue over the same incident. There i am either blaming myself or blaming her. Wait mojo before you even want to blame me please hear me out. You see we started our argument just before she started school and it carried on from there. At first i didn’t understand why? slowly as time goes on it’s in her nature. it’s not that she wants it this way nor she does not love me. Her love for me was different from other girls mojo. She showered me her love through a different light which took me sometime to notice and appreciate it. And i really accept her for who she is. Often a times we argue, i do told her what was wrong… and often a times i say i don’t expect much from her cause i know she is putting in her best effort. One way or another she really did her best. But at times i feel like, Tinkerbelle, can you see what i’m trying to get across to you. I’m not being calculative nor am i a tit for tat kinda guy. I simply just want you to see if certain things could be in place. For sometimes i need the assurance from you. It’s not that I don’t trust you at all. I do. I just want to feel secure. As how any normal relationship would be.s

From the very beginning you told me it’s impossible between us. In terms of different life style of ours, religion issues and most importantly family. But i promise her that i will work things out and ensure you it will be for the good of us. I promise loads of things to you and I’m simply doing my very best. After all I’m only human, i do make mistakes  and seriously loads of them. It’s not intentionally. i mean no harm except for a blissful journey for the both of us. That’s where mis-communication comes in. The differences between us make us tougher to tolerate one another. She kept giving me chances. Telling me to stop hurting myself. Telling me to look after myself. Telling me to cool myself down. Telling me alot of useful tips. She may not use the right words at times but it all came from her heart. And now she can’t take it anymore for she doesn’t want all of this to repeat again. Who wants too? Nobody wants it. Tinkerbelle, i have always been looking after myself. Doesn’t mean i don’t eat nor i don’t sleep I don’t look after myself. It’s just me. At times i go for days without eating all i need is water. That is just me. it’s not because I’m torturing myself. And i use to have Insomnia. I’ve gone through so many sleepless nights. What’s more when there’s problems. I tried my very best but this things it’s just me. Just like when i nag at you for not eating nor sleeping. You always tell me, i will eat when I’m hungry. Don’t worry I will find time to sleep or rest. All I need is a few hours. It goes just the same Tinkerbelle. I may nag, I may say loads of things but at the end of the day i thank The Almighty God that he have brought you to me. I must say i’m really bless to have you to take this journey of mine.

Mojo, remember you always have this MOTTO in you where the you would change the IMPOSSIBLE TO POSSIBLE? Remember? You always manage to succeed in it. And prove others wrong that you can do it even to your own family? I’m really sorry, I took the IMPOSSIBLE to only make it worst. I know I know I’m such a failure. Now she couldn’t take anymore. She don’t even believe in me anymore. I destroyed everything which was so dearly to me. It was simply devastating to hear those words from her. IT was like one of my bad dreams that i had. Gosh!! Now I really don’t have the chance to even tell her things on how i want to make things happen for us. I really hope you would give me the chance, listen me out. It takes time for a clay to mould into a fantastic shaped vase. It takes time for cherrie blossom to bloom. It takes time for a durian to ripe. Yes, i agree it has been a repeated cycle for the past few months. But i have come to my senses to what i need to do and what i need you to know. I really need your support as much as you needed mine. I know it’s tough handling yourself at the same time handling me who is always giving problems. I’m going through the same as you are.

You said you need the break up. You need your own time. You said it will do us both good. You said if I love you than set you free. You said you have made up your mind and nothing will stop you. You said you had enough and will never give me a chance at all. Tinkerbelle, I really do love you whole heartedly. I even grew emotionally attached to you. If you could really sit and listen to what i have to say respect your decision, I will set you free. Set the one you love free and if the person really love you, the person will return your love. The saying goes. Do I believe in that? Yes, I do. and if you really love me, you would return my love one day. Yes, it’s easy to be said than done. It takes time. Loads of time when we talk bout relationship. It’s painful to let you go.. It really does hurt alot and I know it’s hurting you too. Too even say those words. I will be patient. If we are really meant to be, we will reunite. If not, Tinkerbelle! I’m always here for you. In every way that you need my help, please do speak up and I will help you to the best of my ability. I’ve never stop loving you Candice.

All I need now is a chance. I know i should have done this sometime ago. To really sit down and really talk things out. I’m really sorry it took me quite awhile to come to my senses. I already planned for it. I really want to rectify all problems. I really want to talk bout us. I really want us to have a better improved relationship for the Year 2009 with you. I really want you to be happy and i want us to be happy together. Tinkerbelle, please grant me this wish and hear me out. I really need your support and believe on this. I really do. Til now I have not given up on you nor on us and I have never stop loving you. I really believe in you and in us. But it just took much more longer time then expected. Please Candice. Give me this chance to talk things out with you.

PS: Mojo if you only knew the pain that me and Candice is going through or have gone through, PLEASE come back! PLEASE I beg you for I really need your guidence.

Yours Sincerely,

Muhammad Razif

On Bended Kness….

On Bended Kness….

Girlie I can’t explain
Where did we lose our way
Girl it’s drivin’ me insane
And I know I just need one more chance
To prove my love to you
I’ll guarantee
That I’ll never dissapoint you….

Can we go back to the days our love was strong
Can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong
Can somebody tell me how to get things back
The way they use to be
Oh God give me a reason
I’m down on bended knee
I’ll never walk again until you forgive me
I’m down on bended knee

Stop pointing fingers the blame is on me
I want a new life
And I want it with you
If you feel the same
Don’t ever let it go
You gotta believe in the spirit of love
It can heal all things
We won’t hurt any more
No I don’t believe our love’s terminal
I’m down on my knees begging you please……

As bad as i feel for hurting you that way.. as much as you say is not neccessary for me to act that way. but sometimes you keep using words on me which is not entirely true.. Yes you may not see it.. Yes you think it’s alright… but you are not me and you don’t know how i felt… as much hurt you felt… i feel hurt too girlie. And when i explain at times, you would say i’m being petty. Sometimes i dare not argue or talk back for sometimes i feel that you don’t understand me… as much as you feel that i don’t understand you. Sometimes i feel we have not been really opening up to one another to understand each other better. That’s where mis understanding arises or even mis communication.This have got to stop.. like you said.. each time spend together, wanna make it as special as it could be… i want it to girlie… Can we start afresh sweetheart. Been yearning to have or spend happy moments with you.. For you are everything that i really need now. Hope you’ll read this..

Lil’ something for you Girlie…

LET ME HOLD YOU

I been watching you for a minute
Come through here so sweet scented
In life girl you need me in it?
I’m determined to win it
I know what you need
I know what’s wrong
I know how to make it tight
Everything will be all right
If ya
LET ME HOLD YOU
I’ll Introduce you to my world
Introduce you to the better side of life that you aint been seeing girl
I’m show you where it’s at
And Ima show you how to get it
All you got do is be wit it and
LET ME HOLD YOU
Down like a real mans supposed to
I never would have approached you
If I aint have intentions on doing good
See da dude you wit is so fool
To me girl your so cool
And all I’m asking you to do is
LET ME HOLD YOU
Down like a best friend and two homies in a Gang
When you cry I wanna feel your pain
No Secrets, No Games
All Excitement, Nothing Plain
Keep you happy
That’s my aim
And all you gotta do girl is
LET ME HOLD YOU

In My arms In my mind all the time, I wanna
Keep you right by my side till I die, I’m gonna
Hold you down, make sure everything is right wit you
You can never go wrong if you
LET ME HOLD YOU
Down like a real friends supposed to
I’m trying to show you, the life of somebody like you should be livin’
OOOooHHhh Baby Baby
You could never go wrong If you
LET ME HOLD YOU

Never hated myself this much… lostsoul~

NOw NOw…

WHAT HAVE I DONE! Honestly you don’t deserved the treatment the other day from me. Seriously it was not even intended to be that way. i just happened. Loads of things done with you are new…. be it good things or sentimental or bad deeds of mine. I truly apologize for even behaving that way. I know no amount of words nor actions of mine could make up for what happened that day.

All those words.. all those actions.. it was not meant to be. Sometimes i wonder, am i the lousiest Boyfriend you ever had? i always make you cry.. i’m always the unreasonable one… i’m always petty… i’m always uptight, i’m your jealous boyfriend.. Sigh~ i just couldn’t understand. The thought of intruding someone privacy BUGS me out. on that account i truly apologize too.. but at that moment, i saw that name! which i remembered correctly it was recently. that makes me wanna move on to read further. You have every right to feel that way. I’m seriously lost… Once you had a lifestyle of pure happiness… All the attention is at your fingertip.. but eversince we start out it slowly changes… losing of close friends… can’t get the attention you need from them.. no time for all the stuff you did… Is it all me? am i the main course? i don’t know girl. you feel me in? looks as though every cause came from me… but then again you can never have a wonderful lifestyle through out. People change…. Surrounding change… And lifestyle would change if ya attach… it’s about adapting to situation around us.. i may be wrong but then again, why keep on thinking of it in a negative note? have you tried looking at it on a positive note? i don’t know… you feel me in? Yes, you are a private person, but if you need to feel me in, i hope you will. Cause i’m the kinda guy who needs to be fill in.

You think my life is great… you think my life is perfect? no it’s not. It’s a total mess.. trying to survive through it and making it better along the way. Yes i have loads of friends. but they are friends who only come to me when i have the money. What friends do i have now? my closest friends are actually my colleagues besides that i have nothing. Friends come and go in life and they will never stay through out in a lifetime. Everyone have their perception of life. unless they are sincerely there to be your friend. Everyone needs attention. and i’m one of them.. ya not the only one… but often a times i keep it to myself. I’m really sorry if i’m being to sticky… not giving you the space you need… i’m sorry for being petty bout little things.. i’m sorry if ya drained out by just entertaining me with all my crappiness… i’m sorry for causing hell loads of problems… but slowly i’m changing.. Infact ya the first person to mention all the above to me… i’m sorry if you are having a hard time..

You know all i ever wanted is for you to be happy. but it seems all my actions speak of the other way instead of happinness. i really hate myself. i really hate myself for behaving the way i am…. i really hate myself for treating you that way. I know you can’t forgive me. I can’t EVEN forgive myself for treating you that way. Sometimes i’m just frustrated by your actions or your woords you use on me. Just as good as labelling me as a lousy boyfriend. Anal…. Bitch… how many times have you actually use it on me? yes on a casual way, i’m fine but not when ya labelling me down. if ya hurt by me using those words on you, i feel it just the same way.Each time when we quarell or when i make a stupid fuss over issues… i hated myself. never have i hated myself this much…

I’m really blessed to have a Lady like you. I thank GOD for bringing us together. I really do cherish every moment we had together…. I have always respected you.. trusted you… always trying my best to understand you… slowly giving you more space to do your own things. but all i need is the bare minimum from you. I don’t wanna asked for much anymore. For all the things I’ve done to you, I’m truly sorry bout it. I really didn’t mean it to happen that way….  Yes, we are going through this rough patch, this journey full of obsticles… journey which everyone couple wish to go through… i really hope you will hang in there and go through it together. Seriously i am tired of all this arguments which i created. I’m sorry your life is in hell because of me..

Over numberS, Unencumbered Numbered wordS~

Was it you who spoke the words that things would happen but not to me
Oh things are gonna happen naturally
Oh taking your advice I’m looking on the bright side
And balancing the whole thing
But often times those words get tangled up in lines
And the bright lights turn to night
Until the dawn it brings
Another day to sing about the magic that was you and me……

Just another one of those beautiful and meaningful nights spent with my one and the only.. Everyday is a cloud NINE day when i’m with you. Slowly things are starting to fall into place, getting to know you better day by day… seeing bits and pieces of you… never did you fail to surprise me with something new each time we meet. It’s just like fixing up a gigantic puzzle before my very eyes.

 

See I’m all about them words
Over numbers, unencumbered numbered words
Hundreds of pages, pages, pages for words
More words then I had ever heard and I feel so alive…..

The littlest things that you did for me. No matter how nervous or unsure you are, you still did it. The time you cater to me even though you are tired after a hard days of work. Putting up with my nonsense, feeling irritated at times by my of behaviour. See, you don’t have to surprise me with things nor feel bad about not getting me anything for all of these littlest things really do pleased me loads and are truly deeply sincerely appreciated.

 

 

Cause you and I both loved
What you and I spoke of
And others just read of
Others only read of the love, the love that I love…..

Often a  times i find it hard to express myself when i’m with you for at times i’m rather shy. I’m your giant with a sensitive side to it. At times, i would just blushed up when i’m with you. This 2 months have been a sweet filling.. fun loving.. and a chocolatey journey. Yes, it may still be early to determined anythhing… At times, i see myself in you… Be it in the past or now the current phase of our life.

Truly blessed to have found you. Fated to be? You would never know we once used to bump to another or even chat with one another during our younger days. Certain things are meant to be and i’m feeling it. Let’s go through this journey through thick and thin… good times and bad times… sweetness or bitterness… I will be there for you.

LIFE WAS BEAUTIFUL, EVEN BEFORE I MET YOU.

THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS IT BECOMES PERFECT.

PERFECTLY BEAUTIFUL, WHEN I MET YOU……

 

Never have i felt so much love eversince i read those words last night. Every single word means a lot to me. Thank You Girlie…

As much i would like to keep it low.. but this time round i must express myself for i’m truly blessed and i’m proud to have you in my life…. There’s certainly more to come but these are the words which i felt to unleash for now.

BOOMBOOMBOOMBOOM~ Ohhhh oHHHHH……

LETS HAVE SOME FUN!!!!!!

Weeeeeeeeeeeeee………. it’s been Uber Duper sUper long since i last blog!!! And now i’m blogging in the most weirdest place ever….. MAke a guess??? JBAC, campfire site. OMG OMG OMG….. with Eunice and Kok ster behind me…. hahahaha~ Seriously i have no idea what am i suppose to blog bout but there’s a million gazillion things to mentioned…. ROAR~ just to lazy i suppose… 

 

Well will continue when i’ve found my inspiration to blog ya…….

life IS beautiful IF only YOU believe IN it…~

JADED….

That’s the word which describe my present state of mind… I’m worn out!!! by WHAT? by WHOM?

Well everything around me is wearing me out to a point where i need to voice out in order to be heard loud and clear.. Supposedly to start blogging ever since the new year… where resolutions and everything else comes to place then again i just couldn’t find the time or merely lazy to blog. So many things happen lately, fair share of which are memories to be remembered dearly and of those you just wish it never happen..

Seems to me 08 is a very fast pace year for maself…. due to the fact that i am still taking things for granted doing it at my own pace or things just starts to overflow all around me… no matter what i will still take it in my stride and settle what needs to be done.. Up to date tommorrow will be my 8th or 9th camp as a CIC, well taking it slow and steady tho. I believe that i have improve as camp passes by and hopefully my colleagues are doing just as well as i am… Really hope i didn’t offend any of my colleagues be it from which ever department ya in or my instructors too… Loads of things happened in the past few months which got me thinking and thinking over and over again asking myself only this question, ” WHY ARE YOU SOME PEOPLE BEHAVING LIKE IDIOTS ” . Not pin pointing to anyone in particular just that i feel at times we are not handling things nor accepting things with an open heart. Always dwelling on the problem where we should find for solutions to solve the problem. WHY is it so hard people!!!! USE your bloody brain and think. Don’t only think that your angry at the spur moment and just lose control, What do you get at the end of the day?? And don’t even tell me i don’t care, it’s my life i do what i want to do. All i can say is good luck you will be wasted and be regarded as the scumps of society….. I am always around if anyone needs the listening ear, needs advice, needs a shoulder to cry on but if you don’t help yourself, i can never help you…. everyone have problems dudes and dudettes even i myself… but you just need to get hold of yourself, think rationally and i believe you can make it through. Remember there’s no failure only learning process!!! it’s how you look at thinks. Can never have too much of negativity nor positivity….. Okay… felt better now! This goes out to all of my friends and to those who reads my blog!!!!! not shooting to any particular soul…. just feel that i need to let it out!!!!!!!

Finally i am blogging again!!!! wahahahaha… took me bloody 4 months to finally blog. Apologies to Veron for i promise to blog about a few stuff especially GENTING TRIP but i didn’t. It was an unforgettable trip, WHY? cause i GAMBLE for my freaking first time. And yes I’m a MUSLIM!!!! people may think I’m a murtad (definition for murtad is those who are muslims but doing things which forbids them too) well the way i look at it…. My life is such that despite being brought up religiously by my family where I’ve spend my nursery and kindergarten days  in a religious school, going  for religious classes as years goes by, my family still live life as a westerner  maybe due to the fact that my mum is an eurasian and my dad  thai indon. We don’t really practice the life as a typical malay family would. I just have my fare share of reason for which I’m sure most of you would have known. My definition of how am I living my life, Experience all the things you wanted be it right or wrong, go through the process so as you progress in life you really know how to different shade the things you should do and the things you shouldn’t do in life. Nobody wanna commit sins nor living in doubt as age is catching up so why don’t you experience it when ya young and you can repent from your sins. Well all i can say is, To each it’s own. Everyone have painted how they wanna live their respective life.

THE LITTLEST THINGS….

Dreams, dreams of when we had just started things
Dreams of you and me
It seems, it seems
That I can’t shake those memories
I wonder if you have the same dreams too

The littlest things that take me there
I know it sounds lame but it’s so true
I know it’s not right but it seems unfair
That thing’s are reminding me of you
Sometimes I wish we could just pretend
Even if only for one weekend
So come on
Tell me
Is this the end?

What is the first thing that comes to your mind after reading those phrase? First reaction, why so EMO!!!!

Well it’s how you want to interpret it, it could be bout loads of things, imagination must be wild~ Nonetheless it speaks of bout a relationship… well too many dreams sounds not practical!!! people will say stop dreaming, wake up and to your daily routine BUT those who dare to dream will head far beyond expectations…. Dare to Dream for dreams will give us the motivation to move on to greater heights in life!!!~

That’s all for now… till the next time which will be on wed after i break camp….

CHAOZ…….

WILD AND CRAZY!! LIFE HAS TO BE LIED THAT’S ALL THERE IS TO IT

COUNTING DOWN TO A NEW YEAR AHEAD!!!!!!

ALOHA!! 2007 is wrapping up… WELCOME 2008!!!! In like a days time… hehehe~ Well had loads of fun and laughter during 07, the ups and downs, the sweet and bitter memories that we had and even shared with one another.. It was a blast I must say.. Sure am looking forward to what will be install for me in 08… Gotten myself a stable job… A job which I love to do!!!!!! At least I know i’m more or less stable and everything… I know my mum won’t nag at me!! hahahaha… that’s for sure… now she’s nagging bout.. SAVE MONEY SAVE MONEY.. IF NOT HOW ARE YOU GONNA GET MARRIED.. well well.. that will be like years to come before I can even think bout that.. anyways been awfully tired this past few days.. Sigh!! further more having countless of headaches due to my wisdom tooth which is decayed!! infact both of them whic resulted my molar tooth to decay as well… Gonna spend loads of money on that alone… wahahahahha….. PLUS beautifying my teeth!!!!!!! weeeee…. NEW YEARS resolution will be up plus my wishlist for 2008… that will be tmr… wahahahha !!!!!

Till than cheers…. have a smashing new year ahead and happy holidays my peeps!!!!

Hey Ho Merry YOOOOOO~~~ this was suppose to be out like eve of 07… instead of posting it i saved it under draft… my apologies peeps…  will update in ma next post..

WORKING TOWARDS SUCCESS!!!!!!

Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves,
For they shall never cease to be amused….

MOJO SPIRITsss!!!!

1. Choices have consequences
2. Nonsenses makes sense
3. If you happy and you know it clap your hands
4. Shapshift
5. Dance like nobody’s watching
6. Trust builds character
7. Repeat what i say, action just like me
8. Life is about creating yourself
9. Follow your bliss
10. Keep the faith
11. Be true to yourself…..

A sudden change of spirit in just one day!!!! Just as I thought the rest of my day will be a rather emo one or should I say a dull one… Started to get all hype up just before lunch…. wahahaha…. miracles happen you know!!!  Since than  I’ve been as bubbly as wacky as zany as ever… Face were brightly lit up… YESAH!!!! got my spirit back on track once more… there is things or someone I could believe in once more… the rest of the afternoon in office been a superb day for me!!! smilling away.. giggling away for no rhyme or reason… just as I was bout to knock off from work… my Radin Mas Primary contract come… Pep print out the proposal and brief me roughly bout the camp details… All of a sudden I feel the sense of urgency in me.. preparing my papers which needs to be filled before I can proceed with my planinngs of the programmes… so on and so forth….

Rid, buzz me up… he was asking whether I wanna meet up with him… Thinking it wouldn’t come true…. In the end he was there… smartly dress up!!! wahahaha just after interview… no wonder he was rather punctual than before… good job!!! After meeting him.. we decided to crash at our most beloved place or shop of all!!!!! the place where we call home…. Seriously the shop really inspired me alot… PERIOD!!!! It really do inspire us in many ways… be it the environment.. the people there…. the accessories… the concept of the shop itself… simply awesome!!!! You’ll really get 1001 ideas just by popping in the shop browsing through few items… hahahahaha!! weird yet true!!!! simply love the place like hell…. Purchased a few stuff before headed down to starbucks to chill out and just be in our inspiring mood!!!! wahahaha…. simply a place to be when ya feel darn lost!!!!! It really brightens up your day… eing with Rid alone will make you go crazy and start crapping nonsenses 24/7 what else when you put us in the shop…. double the dosage…. anyways that’s all for now leaving you guys with this quotes…..

MASQUERADING ASA NORMAL PERSON 
DAY AFTER DAY IS EXHAUSTING……

HEY HO LET’S GO!!!

ROARRRRR~

Just another day in the office~ this time round with 3 less people… hmm make it 4 not forgetting kent is still on holiday in europe… Better get us something good, maybe a european lady in a package would be nice~ I’ve been rather quiet lately, I don’t know why exactly… Could it be I’m just plain tired not getting enough rest… cause it’s like one after another first was camp.. next reservist followed by chalet after which back to work…. could be that or it could be the conversation I had with someone relating bout our lives…. wahahaha… On one side I feel darn bloody tired.. on the other hand maybe I could just be emo ing away… as to why I really couldn’t figure it out though.

Is there anyone out there who could just take me away… far away from this place.. A place where there is total peace… A place where I could meditate… A place where I can explore myself…A place simply where I can forget bout all my worries and just live life as it is… one day at a time thinking bout nothing except chillin out and let the days past as if nothing is wrong going on in the world we live in today… I don’t exactly what’s the reason i’m crapping like this… but I just have the urge to write all this down…. Never did I once believe in this thing called BLOG… but now here I am confiding in it.. pouring my heart out… maybe cause I ain’t got anyone special to share it with… possibilities are there.. maybe… I’m not sure though~

Yesterday met up with rid, pass me my christmas present and Veron’s one as well…. nice!! Like it alot… Can’t meet rid, the moment I meet up with him all hell breaks loose… Thinkin bout nothing except enjoying and crapping which make sense all the way.. his presence really brightens my day some how… wahahahahaha~

THe GoOd OlE tImEs….

woooooHOOOOOOo~!!!!

Back after 10 days of reservist, Boy oh boy it’s good to be back. Ermm, as in slacking crashing out with my boys and stuff, outfield totally is a no no for me tho. hahaha!! anyways, book a cab in advance for booking in on my first day… thought I was early like among one of those to be there puntual, boy I was wrong!!! the minute I reach there, the queue was like OMG!!!! hahahaha… was super pack like colony of ants moving about, little did I know 754 2sir infantry was there for their reservist as well… Minute i reach the guardroom I was like looking around make sure there was familiar faces around so it will be easier for me to go with, if not I’ll definately be super duper noob since it was my first time there for reservist. Slowly the crowd grew bigger and bigger and more familiar faces was spotted!!

As you know army is for ever troublesome, where you need to in pro, confirming your details, take your passes. Was damn bloody confident I would pass the hair cut inspection. Bloody RSM asked me to get my hair trim by the sides and back, sloppy cut for 5 BUCKS!!! Freaking EXPENSIVE lah, what’s more it’s not even, til I need to trim here and there so I won’t look totally geekish. wahahahaha!! IMAGE IMPORTANT NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE. Once done, thought everything was okay and can straight away head to the company line to check into our bunks and settle down. BOY I was wrong again!! bag inspection, this time round check for contra ban ciggies and camera phones. I was like busy sms ing my friends til I actually forgot to hide it, TOO late!! clever me, Encik already spotted my cell.. left with no choice but to surrender my cell. ARGHH!!! bad start for me man, PERIOD!!!! Pass that, straight away draw arms, my favourite SAR 21 easiest weapon to handle and clean. Headed up to my bunk which like on the 3rd level, settle down my stuf found a great spot where I can like crash for the next 10 days, to my surprise only 3 person from my platoon appear, me, zhi xiang and hmm… forgotten think his not important that’s why I can’t remember!! wahahahah. anyways my platoon never change one bit. Slacker platoon I must say… Always late for everything.. Always with excuses… Always find the easiest way out…always wants the benefits without working for it…. Overall we are the worst platoon compared to the other two platoons in the company or maybe in the entire Battalion. BUT!!!!! when it comes to training, somehow rather we make things happen!!! the happening platoon I must say!!! love you guys loads man!! Never did they change one bit after 3 years since we ORD.

Received our first instructions, prepare SBO (standard battle order) if I’m not wrong.. hehe~ so ya prep our sbo for CO parade and followed by road march!! I was like come on man, just book in so fast have parade and road march… HAIZ!!!! wait a minute, is it road march or route march… wth!!! hahahahaha… once you ORD you tend to forget army stuffs man. Anyways, while falling in with our stuff, section 3 peeps still not here yet. those guys are forever late.. gotta know they miss the parade!!! bunch of slackers!!!!! After the parade prepared for lunch, basically after that the whole day was like slacking away even on the second day…. just slacking away with a few short trainings… best is one of our training only took us like 10 minutes.. hahahaha. for the 2 days spend my days at the officer mass drinking and eating and smoking away!!! catching up on ole good times with them! BOy I miss them alot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

Standard, when your in army or when your back in army, the main few topics that we will always talk about is, GIRLS, SEX, SMOKE, WORK…. hahahahaha~ that is all we talk about. Almost everyone in my platoon is like attached some who is engaged and 2 are like married AND I’m still single….. wahahahaha~ they were like, hey your are the man back in those days what happen?? I was like, Ya what to do… not fated to be!!! hahahahaha~ Thinking about it, maybe I do need to get myself attached, maybe to myself? wahahahaha~

3rd day, woke up for breakfast did our IPPT and I fail!! best of all I failed my standing broad jump! that was a shocker, seriously cause all these while I’m good at my jumping!!! What’s more, I can run!!! hahahaha didnt know I can still run that good though, manage to clock in 10.44 for my 2.4 km, not bad since I didnt did any form of exercises of my own. Didn’t even prep myself physically. After that had our fibua training, it’s a urban warfare training where you would train how to counter enemies in estate areas instead of jungle only. was fun!!! had our lunch out ration at the place itself, standard ration is always late!!! Never change at all!!! hungry man is an angry man you know!! head back to campsite, send in our arms… arms as in our weapons not our arms ah!! wahahahaha!! okay not funny… the rest is slacking at mass… same thing again eating, smoking, drinking and crapping through out the night.

Day 4, had our platoon mission exercise… where we learn how to attack as a platoon but later we broke it down to section exrcise than platoon exercise. Our Pc change here and there for his new to our platoon, Pc Kelvin Kua formally platoon 4 Pc. back in those days he was super extra, always act garang and stuff forever giving us punishment but now he’s relax, like I say RESERVIST only… no need to be so garang can!!!!!Ended our day about 6 plus 7 pm. Headed back, same thing send arms… wash up… slack again… practically it’s talk cock and drink and smoke AGAIN!!!! Never did I smoke so much when I’m out during my daily life compared to in army. SMOKE MACHINE!!!! wahahahaha~

Day 5, WEEEEEE HOOOOOOOO!!!!! Book out day… never ever during my Ns time did we get to book out like 8 am. That is like so early man. Head back home bought breakfast for my family and start to slack at home til evening met up with jup and man, went down to jurong point to get our stuffs and had our dinner before booking in. This time round i’m fully prepared!! Cause the very next day I’ll be in the jungle for like 3 freaking days man!!! wahahaha… same thing once book in, prep our stuff for our outfield … slack again!!!! as per normal, every night is always the same old things that we will do. wahahaha!!  Well one thing for sure we always talk bout girls.. it’s a common thing when you are in NS or in RESERVIST, as long you are in and there are just guys nothing but guys, you’ll end up talking bout girls.. sex… mainly those 2  HOT topics I would say…. Guys will always be guys in the end.. but hey I’m the minority not the majority of guys if you get what I mean ya~

Day 6, get to wake up slightly later than usual for our ration is being pack out for us.. prep our logistics, do a final check before we actually move off.. My company.. all those law gunners out there including me.. we guys decided to gang up and just plainly forget to bring our law!!!! that piece of thing is worthless and it will just irritates me along the way.. wahahahha~ good thing though we didn’t bring it.. It sure lighten our burden!!!! OFF to lim chu kang, Jln Murai. Our first mission!!!! harbouring my platoon is the reserve platoon, that’s where shit happen!!! being the reserve platoon we act as a back up defence for the company which requires manpower to fight… so as they said.. but being our-self, we know who we are in the end… there we were supposedly to dig our own grave to chill for the night… and there i were looking for the best spot which grave was already been dug and left there for quite some time… started to slack.. crapping with my friends… eating and smoking away as usual!!!! AND not forgetting fall asleep!! when you are in the jungle… you don’t care where you lye or sit or sleep.. as long as it is comfortable you’ll be there, trust me boys!! after awhile just before sun sets, bad weather was coming our way.. me and 2 of my buddies decided to make a shelter… hahahha super hilarious can!!! there you are suppose to be on guard protecting your area and there we were making ourself as comfortable as ever.. never in my 2 years in NS did we get to make shelter so GREAT and COMFORTABLE… slack.. sing song.. eat.. smoke.. and even pee together…!!!

First time heard my buddy, Shawn emo ing away with his girlfriend… they some how or rather got into a quarrel so it speaks.. The funniest part of it all was like, middle of the conversation… there were bout few people passing by us.. our responsibility was that we were to halt who ever comes in our way and asked for the correct pass word before letting them proceed. So what he did was half way through quarrelling.. he told his girlfriend, “wait a minute” HALT!!!! PASSWORD… pause for 5 long seconds.. the other party ” your suppose to start off by saying the first password before I can even continue” he goes “orh, HARD…..” the other “DICK” HE goes ” okay you may pass through” just bout he was going to continue with his conversation, they had a big argument this time round… his girlfriend thought that he was fooling around… wahahahha~ poor shawn!! hope you and your girlfriend are doing fine now…

Dawn was here.. the other battalion was ready for the attack.. well no matter how slack we guys are.. we will always put up a good defence before letting them pass through us!!! me and fadily alone kill bout 20 of them.. good one!!! finally after they manage to conquer or territory… we were just slacking waiting for our turn!!!!

Day 7, slacking as we are waiting to head back to rejoin our company… once there shirts off.. campfire time!!! building fire to make us feel at home… cooking our meals… making hot drinks and stuff before down pour… One thing bout army is that…you rush to wait, and you definitely wait to rush!!!! that’s their motto!!!! NEVER CHANGE ONE BIT!!!! Practically it was raining through out the night till it stop roughly bout 6 plus 7 pm. After having our dinner and some time to take a short nap. We pushed off, It always sucked being the front man for the entire battalion!!! So many things I need to do.. Reinforce the markings with silent straw… while looking out for silent straw making sure we are heading to the right path.. as well as acting as the front security for my platoon.. YOU tell me how am I gonna juggle 3 things at the same time further more it’s like 12 midnight when we start to walk… funny!!!! I just don’t know whether I should be angry or happy or just sad for myself!!! anyways follow through manage to reach our objectives way earlier than expected to be… We reached our rvp bout 2.30 am … LESS than 1 click away from our objective… BUT the stupid scouts have to screw it up for us!!! instead of just bashing for bout 1 click that’s bout less than an hour we ended up bashing for bout 3 freaking long hours… everyone was like cursing and swearing at the noob scouts.. I definitely can do better than them anytime any day any where!!! freaking hell!!!!!!!!!!

Day 8, Finally reached our objective at bout 7 am… from there it’s where all hell breaks loose!!!! manage to conquer the objective quite fast.. Maybe due to our frustration and anger which lead us to a quicker victory…. hehehehe! Headed back to camp… send arms, clean our area… packed our stuffs!!!! preparing to book out and never come again.. till our next reservist call up that is.. Night was just super fun… where everybody just celebrate… let loose and drank away… drank bout 6 freaking cartons away man!!!! GOSH!!!!!! these people never did change one bit!!!! wahahahahaha…

Day 9, Book out LOH!!!!!! pack up… area cleaning… prepare to head back to the civilised world out there… just super glad that I’m going back to where I belong… but at the same time, missing these people altogether…. the times we spend together no amount of money nor words could simply describe it!!!! I’m bless to be in this unit let alone to be in this bravo company let alone to be in this great platoon!!!!!!!! SEE YOU GUYS SOON!!!!!

Sorry for the late entry though…. was just super shagged and had too many things to attend too.. further more I wouldn’t want to blog or you wouldn’t want to read a blog which is so dead right??? Till my next post!!!!

CHEERSSS!!!~

SHAGGEDNESS!!!!!

WHAT A WEEKEND~

It’s been a pretty long and shagged plus enjoyable weekend for me though. Back from reservist still didn’t get my proper rest, very next day headed down to work as per normal,  accompanied Ian shop for Christmas present. After which had lunch with Veron and Jeremy, everyone ordered their own dishes thinking would be enough till we got our dishes it’s like pathetic.. help our self with more dishes only this time round with RICE!! wahahha, must say it was a filling one. Was out the whole night, crashing with my army dudes. Having fun and chilling out… was a good time well spend with the boys… See you guys soon man!!

Saturday headed back to office for our meeting which ended bout 1 plus… Me, Veron and Eunice had lunch together at Carl’s junior…. nice!!!! been super long since I had that…. was craving for it whileI was in reservist.. mission accomplish, Straight after that headed down to pasir ris met up with Tim and Amanda for our Christmas Chalet. time to meet was like 3.30 pm ended up meeting about 4 plus in the afternoon. hahaha~! Instructors is forever late and will never keep up to timing!!!! plan our stuffs preparing money and such. BBQ was fun… What I can’t wait was exchanging presents… was being told that who ever attended the chalet must get a present so we could exchange them… Same thing we did for last year only that this time round I was an obedient boy and did not bought kinky stuff! BUT, Melvin.. Tim.. Jeremy and Willie really shock us!!! We go bout labelling the presents, and writing down numbers in small pieces of paper… It’s like drawing lots basically. wahahaha~

Anyways… Melvin’s present was a watermelon.. Jeremy’s present was toilet paper rolls, mind you 3 big packs of it okay.. Willie’s one was a bottle of strawberry jam and a pack of KOTEX, WTH!!!!!!!! and Tim’s one was 3 mineral water bottle or should I say 3 pipe water bottles and tidbits secured in a adidas shoe box with duck tape!!!! Seriously their presents got everyone cracking up like hell… wahahahaha~ After the fun and laughter, we were just chilling out when Pillay decided to play ban luck… in between.. and he wants to gamble!!! haiz gambling only that boy knows… we were like hardcore gamblers playing through out till 6 am in the morning… from just ban luck and in between, poker.. gin rummy were played as well… happy ah Pillay won money while I’m like losing.. but it’s all for fun. Slept right till was only like 12 plus that’s when everyone else woke up.. and I’m still super shagged!!! Jeremy and Veron left to attend some lunch thingy while me and the boys headed out for lunch…

After packing and washing up.. me and rid took our leave leaving those 4 boys (Mel.. Tim.. Jer.. Willie) crashing by themself till tommorrow I guess… Hope you guys are enjoying yourself man.. miss you people alot… Got a movie date with someone!!! wahahaha.. catch Mr Magorium’s Wonder Emporium if I’m not mistaken. It simply was an awesome show man!!! despite me falling asleep for the first half of the movie.. whahahaha~! Asked her to accompany me to get presents for Veron Eunice Jeremy and Ian… was a tough time finding though… I mean the girls wasn’t a problem cause I know what to get for them.. It’s always the guys! It’s always hard to buy stuffs for guys…. wahahahaha~ Even though I’m a guy I still had a hard time buying them present… Maybe I’m just scared that they won’t like it and like just chucked it one side.. cause that’s what I’ll do if I don’t like it.. wahahahha~ how bad am I… But I’m pretty sure they are better than me. Half way through she couldn’t accompanyme for she had to go for dinner with her family… Left alone to shop all the way till 9.30 pm. Luckily I manage to buy for everyone.. My mission is complete man… wahahahaha~ Never ever head down to town area during festive season.. It’s freaking pack like sardines!!!!!!!! Felt awkard shopping alone… not use to it… I’m always with someone when I’m out shopping or any other stuff.. Oh wells might as well get the hang of it… wahahaha~

Guess that’s bout it for now.. tommorrow meeting up with am!!! weeeee~ CUPCAKES here I come!! after that joining Veron Cons and Rid exchange presents than head down to Boss place for Christmas Eve Dinner…. I feel funny though…. today’s blogging seem like not me.. maybe I’m just too tired!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! even my blog bout my reservist is not up.. save it in my drafts… will continue and post it real soon… when one is too tired… they can’t think straight and start to crap and just write down short sentences… like what I’m doing now… OKAY!!!! I’m off!!!!!!!!!~

WILL BE BACK TO UPDATE MORE!!!!!!!!!!!